I think the metaphor broke my spleen.

Rango

(2011)

Absolutely beautiful animation, possibly the most consistently so I've seen for CGI. It's a shame the plot, a blend of Support Your Local Sheriff and Chinatown, doesn't quite live up to the visual imagingation that Gore Verbinski's precise eye brings to the film.

He originated the story, but should possibly have collaborated with a writer with more of a skewed vision than John Logan. Depp's Rango is one part Woody Allen, but has more than a touch of the quick-thinking broad humour Depp brings to his more cartoonish “real” performances.

There's a suitably select support cast (Ray Winstone, Harry Dean Stanton, Ned Beatty, Bill Nighy, Alfred Molina) and some nice touches (a glimpse of Hunter S Thompson, Timmy Olyphant channelling Clint Eastwood). Depp and Verbinski seem most at home in the flights into surreality the film occasionally takes, and you wish there was more of this. Nevertheless, it's a much better western than Cowboys and Aliens.

****

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My name is Dr. King Schultz, this is my valet, Django, and these are our horses, Fritz, and Tony.

Django Unchained (2012)
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Vampire Academy (2014)
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Bohemian Rhapsody (2018)
(SPOILERS) I can quite see a Queen fan begrudging this latest musical biopic for failing to adhere to the facts of their illustrious career – but then, what biopic does steer a straight and true course? – making it ironic that they're the main fuel for Bohemian Rhapsody's box office success. Most other criticisms – and they're legitimate, on the whole – fall away in the face of a hugely charismatic star turn from Rami Malek as the band's frontman. He's the difference between a standard-issue, episodic, join-the-dots narrative and one that occasionally touches greatness, and most importantly, carries emotional heft.

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Outstanding. Now, let’s bite off all the heads and pile them up in the corner.

Venom (2018)
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I take Quaaludes 10-15 times a day for my "back pain", Adderall to stay focused, Xanax to take the edge off, part to mellow me out, cocaine to wake me back up again, and morphine... Well, because it's awesome.

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A machine planet, sending a machine to Earth, looking for its creator. It’s absolutely incredible.

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Now In Full Color, with a Happier Ending

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